First up, announcement: I’m not abandoning the road trip
series. I have detailed notes of every day of the trip and it will be continued
at some point. Those posts take at least an hour to write though, and since I
am busy with school, it’s difficult to motivate myself to write for an hour
after doing homework for 5+ hours. Anyway, to fill in the down time, I have a
new project I’m starting here.
Basically, I’m going to be writing more frequently with
dumps of random things that have happened recently. This was inspired by the
atrocious awareness of Massachusetts drivers, bikers and pedestrians. I have so
many stories of people who should have died, and Twitter doesn’t always do it
justice because of the space limitations. Instead, those will now go here. Also,
random quotes/anecdotes that I wanted to share, but had nowhere to put them, so
enjoy!
I’m starting with an idiot in Harvard Square, because he led
to the inspiration for this. I was driving and had a green light. As I, and the
car next to me, proceeded through the intersection, each of us had to slam on
our breaks and come to a screeching halt, because some moron decided to cross
the street, against a green light. That’s bad. What makes it worse: he was
texting on his phone AND NEVER ONCE LOOKED UP. WHAT THE HELL?! Even after two cars almost hit him and
splattered his brains on our windshields, he had a complete lack of awareness
of the situation. I sincerely hope that message was of vital importance. (Note:
this will be a recurring theme here. I frequently drive near the 50 million
college campuses in Boston and I’m starting to believe all of them need to have
a course during orientation to teach them that they are on an urban campus, and
can’t walk wherever the fuck they like whenever the fuck they want. It’s a
public safety/traffic flow issue).
Comcast
When I first signed up for my cable package, I flipped
through the stations to see what came as part of my subscription. On all of the
stations I did not receive, there was this message: “This channel is free as
part of subscription.” No shit.
Comcast apparently does not have a centralized system across
the country (this astounds me. How can you be a national corporation, but
divide it into different territories where information cannot be accessed? Bank
of America did this also. They broke it down even more though, where Northern
and Southern California were different territories. How is this legal?).
Anyway, I needed to cancel my service in California and open a new account in
Massachusetts, because it was impossible to transfer my package and account. So
I call Comcast to set up an appointment and order my new package, then I needed
to call them again to cancel my old subscription (yes, I really needed to call
again). When I inform the service rep that I’m cancelling my subscription, he
asks why (as everyone does. When I cancelled my gym, they asked for so much of
my current information that I could’ve sworn they were building a FBI dossier
on me). I tell him that I moved and had to open a new Comcast account in Mass.
Direct quote: “Sorry to lose you as a customer” ……… I understand these people
work off a script, but does that limit their ability to comprehend what the
person at the other end of the line is saying. YOU DID NOT LOSE ME AS A CUSTOMER.
I CANCELLED THAT ACCOUNT TO OPEN ANOTHER ACCOUNT WITH THE SAME MONEY BECAUSE
YOUR SHITTY COMPUTER SYSTEM CAN’T HANDLE ALL OF YOUR CUSTOMERS.
Last one:
I went to visit the doctor last week for some immunizations.
Before he comes in, the nurse weighs and tests my blood pressure (which is
fantastic by the way, not that anyone could tell that from these posts and my
Twitter feed). She goes through the standard questions and we have this
exchange (and picture her thick Russian accent, I think that adds to this):
Nurse: Do you do drugs?
Me (remember that I am an idiot and apparently deaf): Hmm… I
mean, I drink probably twice a week.
Nurse: No, I said drugs. No one cares if you drink. Everyone
drinks.
Duly noted.
